Your Child's Amazing Memory Can Help Them Socialize

Dr. Laurent Mottron, a professor of psychiatry at the University of Montreal believes that the scientific community should focus on the unique qualities individuals with autism have as beneficial rather than as weak points that need to be changed (Rettner, 2011).

Exemplary Memory: One of Autism's advantages

Some individuals on the autism spectrum can remember information amazingly well. This might include song lyrics, lines from a movie, or a favorite story they read. Their memories for detail are extremely accurate, which could come in handy when connecting with other people.

Tom Fields-Meyer wrote a piece in the Washington Post about his son Ezra who is on the autism spectrum. When Ezra was 6 his parents noticed his uncanny ability to remember the house addresses of neighbors, relatives, and businesses. Meyers wrote, “What made [Ezra’s] recall even more stunning to us was that it was so contrasted with his outward appearance: spacey, aloof, lost in his own thoughts” (Fields-Meyer, 2011).

When Tom asked Ezra how he remembered all the addresses Ezra simply answered, “I just know”.

In the second grade, Ezra became obsessed with the release dates of animated films. He would gather information from previews at the movie theater and billboards. When Ezra turned 10, a relative gave him a desktop calendar that displayed various Disney movies every day of the year. Ezra used information from the calendar to memorize the titles and release dates of hundreds of movies.

Memories Can Act as a Security Blanket

Elevated levels of anxiety are one common feature of autism spectrum disorder. This anxiety often stems from not being able to predict future events, so memorizing factual information can help individuals on the spectrum feel safe.

The Irony of Amazing Memory Abilities

The way Ezra was hardwired allowed him to flawlessly memorize and recall information that others could not. So why did this same hardwiring make it so difficult for him to memorize his seven classmates' names? Why was it so hard for him to make friends? Why did he obsess over a narrow range of topics and talk about them constantly? Why was making eye contact so painful for him? The line between ability and disability seemed extremely thin.

The million-dollar question was: Would Ezra’s miraculous memory doom him to a life of loneliness and seclusion, or could it help him relate to others? (Fields-Meyer, 2011).

Play to Your Child’s Strengths

When Ezra was 12 he attended a large family gathering. Generally, during these social occasions, the noise and liveliness would overwhelm his senses so he would retreat to a quiet place where he could avoid interpersonal interactions.

At this event, however, he initiated conversations with various relatives, asking them, “What’s your name again?” followed by: “When’s your birthday?”

As soon as he heard the answer, he would respond with a movie title: “June 19th? A movie that came out on your birthday was ‘Mulan.’ June 19th, 1998” (Fields-Meyer, 2011).

Each person he spoke to left the conversation feeling amazed by his incredible ability to connect their birthday with another event from memory.

Years have passed since that family party and Ezra still struggles socially. However, he engages with other people on a level he feels comfortable with. For example, he loves swapping trivia about “The Simpsons” and Pixar movies with his classmates. At the local dog park, he uses memorized information from dog encyclopedias to give people advice about their unusual breeds.

To this day, Ezra regularly asks new people about their birthdays and pinpoints a movie released that same day. When the person appears awestruck and fascinated, he always responds cheerily, “Yeah, I have a very good memory!”

Resources

Fields-Meyer, T. (2011). His autistic son’s terrific memory helps him connect with others. The Washington Post. Retrieved from https://www.washingtonpost.com/national/health-science/his-autistic-sons-terrific-memory-helps-him-connect-with-others/2011/11/10/gIQAYX2npO_story.html

Rettner, R. (2011). Autism Can Be an 'Advantage,' Researcher Says. Retrieved 16 June 2020, from https://www.livescience.com/16849-autism-advantages-research.html